My Spiritual Indigenous Bloodlines

From a time before I was even able to read, I was obsessed with all things aboriginal. I would sneak the Encyclopedia under my covers with a flash light at bedtime and spend hours imagining that I was actually there in the pictures...playing all those games with the other children, helping to cook meals with the women in the camp or fishing and hunting fowl with other boys using our home made spears and bows & arrows. It was the strangest feeling...I knew it was just a book, but I could literally sense the warmth of the sun on my face and the dust beneath my bare feet as I flipped through it.

Danezaa Chief  with his family 1899

During this time in my young life, I often had a set of recurring dreams about being on a very high hill with a native woman and preteen girl, picking berries on a beautiful day with the sun shining and a soft breeze in the air. We were always laughing and singing while we worked. In the initial dreams, I was just there, I just assumed I was 'me' in this dream having fun picking berries. I didn't realize until many dreams later when I saw 'myself' from an outside view that I was actually a little boy of roughly the same age as I was in real life...about 6 or 8yrs old.

For some reason, I always felt connected to a male energy as well whenever we would play 'Cowboys and Indians' as children. (Yes, I AM old enough to be able to use those terms and still hold some sort of political correctness in my statement! lol ;D) Of course there was never a question of which side I would choose to play on and I felt an intense sense of pride in playing that role. Every time I could play as a child and young teen, I was playing something connected to an aboriginal existence, that was just where my interests were I suppose.

Danezaa Tipi near Peace River, AB 1899

I am 42yrs old this year, and nothing has changed. My wind down time in the evening before bed is spent on Youtube going through videos of Jingle, Round and Warrior dances from Powwows! lol After a lot of research, I am learning that the Danezaa people were the ones who inhabited the lands where I was born, prior to 1793 when Alexander Mackenzie first made contact with them. I look at the pictures dated from the late 1800's of women and children sitting outside their tipis in the cold winter and I am moved to tears...and I can't explain why! Was I there in a past life? I do believe in reincarnation...could that explain my obssession?! My half Cree niece calls me her 'White Indian' Aunty. I don't have a drop of native blood in me, but I feel in my SOUL that I am!! So I suppose that's why I've become comfortable in saying that I have spiritual indigenous bloodlines. ;D I don't know how else to explain it...