Dying To Fit In

On February 14, 1979, my mother died suddenly from complications after a gastric bypass surgery at 29 years of age. She weighed approximately 275lbs and had tried every other conventional method of losing weight without success before her doctor suggested this pioneering procedure. When I say she tried every other way to lose weight, I'm not over exaggerating. I was very young, but I remember her endless attempts back then with and without friends or family to bring along for the journey...Weight Watchers, Ayds candies, Metracal shakes, The Stillman's Diet...I could go on and on. Nothing worked because, looking back at her baby pictures now, it was blatantly obvious that she was never supposed to be skinny.

Mom's first birthday, 1950

Driven by a culture that pressures girls to look a certain way, act a certain way, dress a certain way, eat a certain way... I don't think she ever stood a chance at being normal...at being happy with what she saw in the mirror. Despite her size she was a healthy and vibrant young woman...and an avid sports enthusiast. She never sat on the sidelines...ever. She played softball, hockey, football, basketball, volleyball...you name it...for all of her junior high and high school teams.

Mom and her older sister, 1951

The fondest of memories comes back to me now of her playing football. We were on a family vacation with a few other families my parents were friends with. We went to Yellowknife that summer and for those who aren't aware of this, there is 24hrs of sunlight in the NWT over the summer months. After we kids were put to bed, the adults all played tackle football next to the campers until well after midnight. Peeking out the windows, we sure admired her. Mom was a force to be reckoned with out on that field! :D I also remember her showing me many times how the caps over her knees were smashed so badly to bits from all the times she'd slid home playing softball. LOL It used to give me the willies pushing those cartilage pieces around under her skin!

It has always saddened me to know that it was peer pressure and our own culture that took this beautiful woman away from my little sister and me when we were so young...and for what? Corporate sales? That's all it really comes down to, right? Money and corporate greed. Now...34 years later...has anything really gotten any better?

Practicing Magic is Simply Harnessing the Power of Prayer!

Dispelling the fear and ridicule of those practicing witchcraft is so damn hard and I can't understand why. To say that the practice is evil would be like saying that praying in any other faith is evil as well. I don't get it. When you pray, your harnessing energy and directing it towards a common goal that you and/or others in your faith would like to achieve. That's EXACTLY what we do when we practice the Craft. The only difference is that we believe WE are responsible for what we've created through our 'prayers' instead of 'God'. How is that different, tell me? For those who take joy in ridiculing witches, isn't harnessing mental energy like this based in science? The whole power of affirmation kind of thing? Would you ridicule other faiths out in the open because they believe in 'imaginary beings'? I'm not talking about ridiculing them online, everyone's self confident enough online to ridicule anyone else, but in real life, too? Every time the topic comes up in real life, I hesitate to mention my Pagan path because of all the Harry Potter jokes and crap. I'm sick of it.

While we're on the topic of magic, I'd also like to point out that there is NO SUCH THING as 'white magic' and 'black magic' it's MAGIC...or PRAYER...plain and simple!! Everything in life has positive aspects and negative aspects, yin and yang, light and dark. Black and white magic are nothing more than marketing gimics...like Christmas and Halloween! So...anyone who tells you they are a 'White Witch' is full of SHIT and doesn't know enough about the path itself to even be representing it! Ok, end rant! lol :P